His father's disgust, his mother's beatings and scoldings, his classmates' ridicule... None of them seemed to want to see him, a despised person. He was a person abandoned by God.
Finally, dead. Then I don't have to endure everyone's unabashed disgust...
Why? Why! Would he come to this world with such a shameful secret? Why let him endure it? He is really, really tired...