It is already the third month since I came to this completely unfamiliar environment. I woke up in a daze, grabbed my phone, and at 16:27 pm Beijing time, my roommate in my college class asked me why I was looking for her. I replied, "I miss you." Who knew?? I smiled silently and got up from the bed. Chen Mo said that I was living like a man possessed during this period, and my brain was going crazy. I also felt like it. Looking at myself in the mirror Looking at my pale and bloodless face, I suddenly felt that I should live more like a young man. The past time and the past people are like the lilies that bloom every year in the garden. What remains in my memory is always its swaying slender branches in clusters when the wind blows, with the trauma on my face, the loneliness of laughter, the vicissitudes of laughter, the miserable and desolate laughter. But I have never known its scientific name. I only know that it has been deeply present in my life from the beginning of my memory.