She said she had never loved me and had never been happy with me.
Every time I think about it, I feel indescribably sad.
I have been trying my best to suppress my longing for Xiaoxing, and I have always convinced myself to forget about the past, but in the incomplete picture of youth, her pictures are everywhere, although the complete stranger now is something I did not expect.
But I don't believe that I have never brought her happiness, and I don't believe that she has never loved me.
I sat up quickly and turned on the computer. I started browsing her Penguin Space homepage one by one, until I saw a post she made on September 7, 2010, "I sat side by side with you on the ground, and you happily told me the strange anecdotes that happened around you, exposing your dimple on one side. I felt like you were a little angel. You kept giving me happiness, but I didn't make you happier..."
At first, I didn't quite believe that the "you" Xiaoxing mentioned here was referring to me. But thinking about it again, my sadness seemed to have eased a lot, and my consciousness was already a little confused. However, I believe I once remembered being on the grass with her, looking at the stars, singing songs, and the atmosphere was quite harmonious, just like we had been husband and wife for many years.
Speaking of songs, I remember the last song Xiaoxing sang to me, "Suddenly".