When I was sixteen years old, I first saw Sheng Gen fighting with someone in the corridor. The way he looked at her in the office was like looking at someone he shouldn't be near. But Shen Zhibei insisted on getting closer, using a piece of self-examination, a bottle of medicinal wine, and countless self-study sessions with him late into the night to get into his world bit by bit.
He is a "problem student" who is isolated by the whole school, and she is the only monitor who dares to sit next to him to eat. Everyone thought that Shen Zhibei saved Sheng Gen, even she herself thought so.
Until before graduation, she accidentally opened the diary in his drawer, and it was written - not a love message. It is a line of words that is so calm and almost cruel: "The closer the distance, the clearer it becomes that we are not from the same world."
Only then did she realize that he had been waiting for her to get tired of him and wait for her to leave all these years. It's not that he doesn't love her, it's that he doesn't believe that she will really stay. All his silent companionship is just a kind of silent waiting that "the deadline has not yet arrived".
Shen Zhibei broke up. She didn't even tell him the reason, only that he never really believed her.
We met again five years later, in the same city. Shen Zhibei thought that time would dilute everything, until he stood in front of her house all night and handed her a folder early the next morning. Inside were all the things she didn't know about in the past five years - all the pay stubs from his part-time job, the medical expenses he anonymously advanced when her parents were hospitalized, and an application to go abroad that was never sent, dated the day after they broke up.
"Besides," his voice was so hoarse that it was almost inaudible, "you think I don't believe you. In fact, I don't. Because if I do, I won't be able to let you go."
And what was written on the application to go abroad was - "Apply to give up the quota because someone is waiting for me."
He waited for her for five years, in the stupidest way. She abused him for five years, but she didn't know that for every indifferent response, he wrote "It's okay" in his heart.
Intention: Leaving and staying are both destiny
