Lin Zhiwei, a sensitive and withdrawn girl, is trapped in the gray-toned teenage years.
The native family has no warmth and fireworks all year round, and the coldness of silence fills the years, and no one catches her trivial and overflowing thoughts. The sea of test questions is an airtight cage. The teacher prefers tact and ignores the desolation hidden in her words; cherished friends gradually drift away, and all the one-way enthusiasm is in vain.
She suffered from a deep inferiority complex about her appearance and figure. She spent countless late nights questioning herself about nothingness, suffering alone in self-pull, self-delay, repeated collapse and forced endurance. Words are her only refuge, and the pages carry all the grievances, loneliness and obsessions that no one listens to.
She once regarded top universities as her only salvation, hoping to escape from the coldness of her native place, worldly comparisons, and the regret of not being favored by relying on Ti Hai. In countless sleepless nights, I struggled repeatedly with cowardice, inferiority, and obsession, and grew up alone in the midst of failed expectations and desolate eyes.
From being confused and escaping as a teenager, to struggling and internally conflicting as a young man, he finally loses his paranoia and sensitivity, and gently reconciles with his incomplete nature, regretful relationships, and imperfect self.
The pages turn to ashes, the thoughts fall to ashes, and all the festering past finally leads to a gentle and self-consistent life.
Purpose: It tells the story of a girl who is sensitive and lacks love. She struggles with her inner conflict, the pressure of taking exams, her inferiority in appearance, and her obsession with not getting what she wants. After a long period of mental inner conflict and self-healing in solitude, she finally lets go of her obsessions, accepts her imperfections, reconciles with the past, and completes self-salvation and personality growth.