The Scratch Paper Hides My Heartbeat

Su Yan, an art student training for art exams, has parents who have suffered from severe emotional disorders and psychological problems for a long time: his mother is deeply anxious and controlling, blaming all the unsatisfactory life experiences on Su Yan's "not doing his job" and endlessly blackmailing him with emotions and conveying negative emotions; his father is absent and paranoid, constantly belittling his artistic talent, and exerting extreme pressure with the words "if he fails to pass the exam, he will destroy the whole family." Long-term mental internal friction and suppression caused Su Yan to fall into severe self-denial and anxiety. He did not dare to express his needs and was accustomed to please. Only his paintbrush and sketchbook were his only emotional outlets. Lu Yubai, the top liberal arts student in the same class, is regarded by everyone as "the proud son of heaven" - he is always ranked among the top three in his grade. He is calm, gentle, and always calm and decent. He is a model student in the eyes of teachers and a reliable partner in the eyes of classmates. After a transfer, the two became roommates. Lu Yubai was the first to discover Su Yan's anomaly: he would tremble all over after receiving phone calls from his parents. From that day on, Lu Yubai became Su Yan's first light in the darkness. He would use scratch paper to write down the steps to solve the problem and mark "You are awesome" in the corner; when Su Yan was forced to collapse by a phone call from his parents, he would take him to hide in an empty studio, quietly accompany him to paint, and listen to what he said about things he dared not tell anyone. Anyone who feels wronged will firmly tell Su Yan, "Your paintings have warmth and are not useless," and help him pick up his shattered self-confidence bit by bit. When Su Yan's parents make trouble at school, they will stand in front of him and help him isolate himself from all harm. With Lu Yubai's company and support, Su Yan slowly walked out of the quagmire of self-denial, learned to face her own emotions, and quietly included this gentle young man in all her future plans. Everyone thought that Lu Yubai was invincible, but only he knew that behind this "perfection" was his parents' extreme perfectionism requirements, the tension that did not allow any mistakes since childhood, and the negative emotions that had long been accumulated to the critical point. He took on all Su Yan's pain, but was used to hiding his anxieties and always being the one who could solve all problems. In the second semester of his senior year of high school, Lu Yubai suffered a complete breakdown after a series of mistakes in mock exams, increased expectations and pressure from his parents, and long-term mental infighting, and was diagnosed with moderate depression. The light he once had was extinguished. Lu Yubai closed himself off, his grades plummeted, he refused to communicate with everyone, and he even lost all interest in life. This time, Su Yan stepped forward. He is no longer the child who needs to be protected. He uses the method that Lu Yubai once taught him, pulling him forward little by little: he will fill his sketchbook with drawings of the sunsets and starry skies that Lu Yubai likes, and fill them with words of encouragement; he will accompany him for a walk on the playground every day, and stay quietly When he is around him, he does not force him to speak, but only tells him "You don't have to be my light forever, I can wait with you until dawn"; he will check all the information, accompany him to psychological counseling, help him take medicine on time, and stand firmly by his side to fight against his parents' incomprehension and accusations. They completed a two-way redemption in the chaotic senior year of high school. It is not that one person always acts as another person's armor, but takes turns to be each other's safe haven; it is not that love heals the pain, but that companionship gives the other person the courage to fight against suffering. They supported each other, survived the darkest days, and survived the college entrance examination. The college entrance examination results were released, one in the south and the other in the north. In the end, they did not pass the exam in the same city, leaving behind the regret that they could not be successful in their youth. But at the end of the story, they held each other's hands in the studio where they had stayed together and agreed, "We will move forward on our own paths first. It doesn't matter. We are still each other's most solid foundation." The formulas on the draft paper will fade, and the drawings in the sketchbook will be blurred, but the redemption and love they gave each other in that senior year of high school will span the distance and accompany them in the years to come. Purpose: Focusing on the special growth points of the senior year of high school, it tells the story of Su Yan, an art student who bears the psychological trauma of his original family, and Lu Yubai, a top student who seems to be perfect but is actually in deep emotional trouble. During their time at the same table, they went from one-way light and redemption to two-way support and companionship. They took turns being each other's safe haven, and finally, with the regrets of youth, each rushed to life's growth and pure love story. It rejects the suspended narrative of "love cures all diseases", faces up to mental illness and the trauma of the original family, and restores the most authentic youthful thoughts and two-way redemption.