"I was bound to the fishing system of all things. I wanted to be the prince of the First Emperor, but instead I became the monkey of the First Emperor. Dressed as a baby golden monkey, I fell from the sky on the top of Mount Tai and fell straight into the arms of the First Emperor who was offering sacrifices to heaven and enshrining Zen. Here, I was regarded as an auspicious sign by His Majesty and brought back to Zhangtai Palace to be raised... In the following years, I became the only living creature on His Majesty's large black lacquered table, the only monkey in His Majesty's palm, and his beloved." - Qin Sheng's confession.
In the twenty-eighth year of the First Emperor of Qin, the First Emperor and his ministers went to Mount Tai for a Buddhist ceremony. On their way down the mountain, they were suddenly hit by a heavy rain. The First Emperor took shelter under a big tree. Suddenly, a small golden monkey fell from the sky and smashed into His Majesty's arms. The people around him were so shocked that they became horrified! The attendant was so anxious that he wanted to draw his sword and kill the monkey immediately!
At the critical moment, the First Emperor lowered his eyes and met the eyes of the little monkey in his arms. He heard a milky and excited voice that came to his ears clearly in an instant:
[Woooooo! Mommy! I'm on my way! I actually met Qin Shihuang! His Majesty the First Emperor! Hot! Alive! High! Handsome! ! !
His Majesty the First Emperor's eyes trembled, and he was shocked: "!???" [Did the little monkey in his arms become a spirit? Or did he have a spiritual connection after just finishing the sacrifice to heaven? ]
…
In the Zhangtai Palace, facing the heavy bamboo slips that Your Majesty has to review one stone a day, I worked hard to "catch" "papermaking" and "printing" for Your Majesty. By accident, I promoted the advent of the imperial examination system more than 800 years ahead of schedule, solving the dangerous dilemma of the Qin army having no battle to fight and the military merit system crumbling after the unification of the world!
On the shores of the East China Sea, facing Xu Fu, a liar who was trying to trick the First Emperor into immortality, and wanted to drive a big ship and take boys and girls out to sea to find the Immortal Mountain. I screamed, rushed up and punched and kicked him! Strongly protected His Majesty the Emperor's huge pension!
The Yue people were rampant and invaded the border of Chu territory wantonly, which made His Majesty furious. He wanted to raise troops to attack Baiyue in the south. I backhandedly "fished" for His Majesty the Emperor "Miasma Antidote Pills" and "Baiyue Accurate Map", which made His Majesty the Emperor very happy and stroked my stuffed monkey head.
…
Later later
His Majesty's confession:
"Since the twenty-eighth year, I have been on Mount Tai, with the Immortal Monkey in my arms. After hearing the voice of the monkey's cub, I have been able to continuously obtain magical items from the Monkey's hands that can strengthen the country and enrich the people. They are called: papermaking secrets, printing magical books, gunpowder secrets... Potatoes, corns, sweet potatoes... Saddles, horses Stirrups, horseshoes... Since then, the world that I have kneaded together with great strength has become more and more stable, and the national power of Qin has also begun to develop rapidly and improve in an all-round way. Everything goes well for me, and I show my beauty day by day. However, there are only three things that make me unhappy:
1. Every time he meets the capable minister Zhao Gao, the little monkey screams in his heart: "Your Majesty!" Traitor! Big traitor! Kill him! Kill him quickly!
2. Every time I see my youngest son Hu Hai, the little monkey jumps on my lap excitedly: [Your Majesty! Your Majesty! Foolish King Qin II! Completed Da Qin in three years! The second generation of the Great Qin Empire died! Kill him! Kill him quickly!
These two things made me horrified! ! !
However, this is not the thing that troubles me the most. The thing that troubles me the most is——
The fairy monkey has a spirit, and he often hears me asking him pious questions - "Asheng, Asheng, where is the fairy mountain?" Where can I find the elixir of longevity? "
The little monkey must be there immediately! Right now! No hesitation! Lying in my arms, he kicked his legs, his body stiffened, he closed his eyes and pretended to be dead!
Alas alas, Zhao Gao is easy to talk, Hu Hai is easy to talk, but the matter of immortality really makes me sleepless at night, and I am troubled! "
Note: The copy of this article was written on January 24, 2026, and has been screenshotted and archived.
Mission: Love is the courage to grow