He is a luminous crystal, my eighteen-year-old obsession, and a hot person that I dare not approach.
It turns out that a broken mirror is hard to be made whole, not because the mirror is broken, but because I don't want to be his shadow anymore. The coolness of mint candies and the scent of ink from seventeen famous books are the hottest obsessions in my entire youth.
I hate his perfection, but I covet the warmth of his fingertips. The sober sinking is my most humble footnote to this relationship. He is the cool academic god who is number one in his grade, and is the light of all stars. I chased his light for a long time, until one day I realized that what I wanted was not to "become him", but to "be myself".
This secret love that started with "Mu Qiang" finally lost to my self-esteem. Love his excellence, hate his perfection. In the end, I chose to let him go and let myself go.
The wind of eighteen years old blew away my obsession and also brought my growth. In this relationship, I have been struggling repeatedly between "getting closer" and "escape". I was afraid of becoming his appendage, but later I realized that the best relationship is not to chase the light, but to become your own light. We have watched the sunset side by side, and we have also gone our separate ways in the sea of people.
An eighteen-year-old secret love is a sober sinking and a silent exit. He is light, but I am afraid of being burned by the light.
Intention: Souls that are too similar can not only produce the ultimate resonance, but also be suspicious of and consume each other due to the self-deficiencies reflected in each other; true love is not to become a copy of the other person, but to stand side by side with another complete soul on the premise of maintaining independent personality. When the boundary between love and hate is blurred, when the balance between imitation and self is out of balance, letting go is not only to let the other person go, but also to redeem the self that is about to be lost.