[Excerpts from Xu Sheng's diary]
My physical exam is normal
Except for the stomachache that lasted for five hundred days, and a lover who only I can see
The psychiatrist said this needs treatment as soon as possible
Treatment plan: medication control, psychological counseling and relief
I take my medication on time, do psychotherapy, and practice "healthy" thinking
My pain is getting lighter and lighter, and he is getting further and further away
The doctor said I was "recovering very well"
It wasn't until I signed the discharge consent form that I saw a line of small words appearing in the Party B column:
"Allow pain to remain, allow memories to be archived.
Allow me not to fully recover, but to be fully alive. "
The handwriting is mine
The color of the ink is exactly the same as the handprint that appeared out of thin air.
"It turns out that the deepest healing is allowing yourself to never heal."
[Reading warning]
*Atypical love is the ultimate symbiosis of illusion and host, pain and redemption
* Intense psychological description, real pain
* The treatment process is difficult and repeated, no golden fingers
*HE is not a traditional sweet article - it is a sober hope to continue living with scars
> To readers:
> This is not a story about "overcoming the disease", but about "negotiating the disease and moving forward with the hurt".
> If you've ever felt ununderstood, if you've struggled in some way (even an unhealthy way) to stay alive - this story might help you see a part of yourself.
> Please remember: Literature presents extreme cases. For real help, please seek professional support.
> May everyone walking in darkness eventually find their own, imperfect but solid light.
I love you, see you tomorrow
Intention: Reconciling with oneself rather than defeating oneself