An angry remark from childhood - "I will definitely not be filial to you when you grow old" became a wound between mother and daughter that could not be healed for thirty years.
Her name is Cuihua. She was born in the 1950s. She has never experienced hardship, but she has suffered all her life.
She loves cleanliness to the point of being paranoid. She never spanks her children with her hands, only a broom;
She boiled expired milk and fed it to her thin daughter without touching any of it herself;
She worked hard to provide her daughter with education just so that she would "not be like me."
And "I" have been rebellious since childhood, escaping from beatings, and resenting her roughness. It was not until many years later that I saw clearly:
Those chases under the broom, the silence at the dinner table, the money handkerchief hidden late at night...
It's all the love she can't express.
Purpose: This is a private history about ordinary Chinese mothers, and also a letter of apology thirty years late. There are no earth-shattering stories, only endurance and sacrifice day after day - and it is these tiny lights that illuminate a girl's way to escape her fate. Dedicated to all those who have been "beaten and scolded" by their mother, but are always deeply loved by her.