Uma Musume: The Gilded Eyes That Never Go Out

Come on. I would like to make a suggestion: colloquial expressions with personal emotions such as "our" and "gilt/Miss Zhukong" should not appear in non-character dialogue/psychological activities. The narration text from the God's perspective should be objective. Because this kind of expression will make readers feel that the author has jumped out of the story and is talking directly to the readers, it is easy to break the immersive boundary of the narrative. It is only suitable to appear in the narration text when "Miss XX" is a "code name" before the character's identity is unlocked, or when it is in the limited third-person focusing perspective of other characters.

The main frame is okay, but the lack of emotion is a bit hollow. This early stage can actually be made up for. It can be written as the protagonist's process from being cold and human to being emotional, but it also depends on the author's writing skills. You can look at other Jockey Girl fans, such as Dark Warrior, from Japan Start with ordinary things or some small things in life, and write more. These can best express emotions (it is best if the protagonist can talk more, this flaw will be fatal later). I will give it four stars for the time being. The author will continue to work hard. If there is greater progress in the future, five stars will be given [plus one on the bookshelf]

It's pretty good, but I can make up for some daily routine, I can write about fans and training (although it's there, it's just one or two sentences, it's not very organic, it's about taking Mayumi Express to practice bends, why didn't I write it in detail...) You can write more about people other than the protagonist. I will write a paragraph: In the audience. Currently, many people who know Gilded Gold and Silent Linlu came to watch the battle. There are all members of various teams, as well as juniors like Mayumi Express. In the front row, even the Rudolph symbol has arrived. "Suzuka, you are indeed in excellent condition." The trainer, who was hugging his chest and slouching, could not help but raise the corners of his mouth. After the efforts of all members of Sirius, Suzuka's current run will never be hampered by any obstacles! (I haven't watched it for a long time, I'm not a senior 🐴P) "Suzuka, run wildly!" "Suzuka, come on!!!" Everyone in Sirius shouted. Gate No. 12, Gilded and empty The calm girl seems to have a hint of a tyrant... Before taking a break backstage, the conversation I had with Canopus and Oguri Hat seemed to still be in front of me. "Run carefree!" Xiaoli Hat "Pass them all!" Twin Turbo "Come on, Mr. Gilt" Excellent qualities "I will watch you carefully" Ikuno Dudis The first step towards the top of Japan! And now——! The game is finally about to begin. The girl's eyes were faintly shining with golden light, and she couldn't help but look at the silent Suzuka. But he quickly retracted it and set his sights on the grass outside the gate. Thousands of trainings are just today. The next moment, the countdown suddenly dropped. 10! 9! More than a dozen horse girls in the audience were all focused on the gate. 3! 2! Gilded Zhukong concentrated his attention and took a posture. In the next moment! 1! (I don't want to write it anymore. It's all about big chase routines. It's so boring. QwQ should have more skill sets, otherwise it would be really difficult to write...) (I actually want to write that Gold is always at the end of the team later. I will write a commentary. Rudolf Symbol and Maruzen Shiki discuss Gold and boast that the growth of the juniors is really great. Before the last corner, Gold starts a super long sprint. Come on Mayumi, Gold is one over ten. In the end, Suzuka is arrested in a straight line, achieving a record of 1 over 11 and arresting the great escape horse girl. But forget it, I couldn't finish writing while fishing in class. The university is a besieged city. Some people want to come in and some want to leave. I am a maggot, I want to go out and turn into a fly)

Come on, come on, it looks great!!! (☆▽☆) You must write it down!!!! (..)

It's pretty good, but the little chestnut hat doesn't quite fit that dull look, and it looks like a cold, big-eating king.

Come on, author, you must keep writing! 🥰

The pace of the game is very fast, eloquent 😏, and very exciting. I like reading these kinds of novels about horse racing girls the most.

So pretty! Must be five stars!

Keep writing. I found this book when I was in a book shortage. I really like it.

@Rabbit doesn't like eating eggplants. Will the protagonist run to the Arc de Triomphe later?