Lin Qing died in an elevator. When he opened his eyes, he had become the fifth direct disciple of the White Jade Sword Sect. At the fifth level of Foundation Establishment, with a disciple’s waist token, he found the sect leader standing before him, demanding he win the sect tournament.
He had no idea how to cultivate properly. Eye-poking, crotch-grabbing, bricks, sucker punches, the Thousand Years of Death, he hadn’t forgotten the tricks he’d learned as one of the top enforcers at the Hall of Righteous Unity. After seven matches, every disciple in the sect instinctively squeezed their legs together whenever they saw him.
By the way, during one crotch-grabbing attempt, he got a handful of empty air from a junior brother dressed as a man. He crouched on the platform, stunned for ages. “Bro, where’d your balls go?”
The sect leader said he was hiding his true abilities. That night, Lin Qing snuck into the wine cellar on the back mountain and diluted the 300-year-old liquor with spring water. The next day, the sect leader summoned him to his study and said, “Nice job diluting it. Next time, remember to boil the water first.”
Later, he bought spirit herbs with spirit stones, dried and shredded them, rolled them into paper tubes, and lit one up. He coughed until tears streamed down his face. Three days later, half the sect was lining up to buy cigarettes from him.
Later still, when the Divine Fist Sect tried to seize a spirit ore mine, Lin Qing spat out a blade of grass on the table where the two sects were facing off and turned to leave. “Why bother negotiating? I’m calling in backup.”
All by himself, he was turning an entire cultivation sect into a den of chain-smokers.
For an unconventional cultivation journey, give it a puff and see for yourself.
