Long Live My Emperor, Long May He Be Shattered

Ma Siyuan, an overworked corporate drone who dropped dead from exhaustion.

The good news: he was reborn as an emperor.

The bad news: a coup is just 100 days away, and every official in the court is loyal to either the empress or the chancellor.

The even worse news: the System he’s bound to is called “Those Who Follow Me Prosper, Those Who Oppose Me Perish.” It sounds impressive, but the first time he uses it, a eunuch just rolls his eyes at him.

With no other choice, he gathers palace maids who empty the night-soil buckets, demoted minor officials, and elderly matrons who have fallen out of favor, then sets up the “Turnaround Bureau” in the Cold Palace.

He uses KPIs to crush corrupt ministers, OKRs to dismantle the coup, and laxatives to send the rebel army running for the latrines.

Who says a corporate drone can’t be a good emperor?

I, Your Majesty, specialize in putting every dissenter in their place.