Playing Dragon Ball with GTA: Making Piccolo a Mission

Over ten thousand in battle power? Blowing up stars at the drop of a hat?

In this Dragon Ball wasteland where human life is worthless, my battle power is only 5, and I’m always at risk of being vaporized.

Luckily, I have the GTA Online System, which lets me exploit a game-breaking bug in this high-martial-arts world! As long as I’m alive, a can of eCola restores my health instantly. Duck into a luxury apartment and my maximum wanted level vanishes. I even have an unlimited weapon wheel at my disposal, with no delay when drawing a gun!

I don’t cultivate immortality or train my energy. I go from an orphan scavenging in West City’s slums to the CEO of a multinational security corporation in Los Santos.

The Red Ribbon Army? King Piccolo? They all become my ATMs and targets for “large-scale heist missions.”

When the Saiyans arrive, will they still think Earthlings are easy prey when they see the orbital cannon array I’ve set up?