Lin Xuan is a senior in high school, known around school as “the ultimate embarrassment.” At the start-of-term assembly in his first year, he recited “Principal, You’re Like the First Cup of Milk Tea in Autumn.” At the sports meet in his second year, he chased the grade director in a dinosaur mascot costume. Last Christmas, he requested “Today You’re Marrying Me” over the speakers in every boys’ restroom.
All of it was against his will.
Three years ago, he fed a white cat a sausage in the alley behind the school. The cat asked him, “Do you long for love?” His hand jerked, and the sausage fell. The cat said, “You have insulted the gods.” Ever since, a Romance Choice System has lived in his head, offering him three options at crucial moments: A, humiliate yourself; B, humiliate yourself even more; C, humiliate yourself so badly your ancestors will feel it in their graves. If he doesn’t choose, the most outrageous option is carried out by force.
All he wants is to make it through the final 278 days until the college entrance exam, then leave this city and get far away from everyone who knows him.
