Scientific Immortal Cultivation: Starting by Making My Dad Roar in Anger

[Anti-Trope + Scientific Cultivation + Hilarious Daily Life + Tormenting Dad, Brother, and the Cultivation World + Entire Family of Good-for-Nothings + No Romance]

#ScientificCultivationGoneWrong #DailyPranks #FiveElementRootsTurnaround #Anti-TropeCultivation #Laugh-Out-LoudEnsemble #LightheartedAndHealing

Other people cultivate immortality with spiritual roots. Gu Yue does it with her brain.

A penniless five-year-old, starting her cultivation journey, tests as having the cultivation world’s most useless five-element roots?

Gu Yue smiles faintly: A single spiritual root is a dead end. Five roots are my destined path!

With the periodic table in her head and a perpetual motion machine powered by mutual generation in her pocket, while others grind away at cultivation, she takes apart the rules of heaven and earth!

But while her ideal is to crush everything with science, reality is a family-wide disaster.

Her bargain-bin dad, Gu Ci, is always on the verge of a breakdown, yelling:

“You said thermal expansion and contraction would fix the table leg, but you roasted it into a bowlegged mess?”

“You said you’d use optical refraction to roast sweet potatoes, but you set Uncle Wang’s spirit-chicken coop next door on fire?”

“You said you’d use leverage to draw water, but you pried a century-old stone mill into the well?!”

And it’s not just her dad who’s losing it. She’s also got an older brother who’s a “professional sister-tormentor”:

“My sister said smearing sweet potato scraps on the Third Elder’s robe is called ‘tactically leaving a biological marker’!”

“She also said that if you get caught stealing peaches, you should say Dad ordered you to do it. That’s called ‘shifting the blame’!”

Gu Yue: ...What the heck is “tactical” about that?

I taught you how to frame people, and you learned to shift the blame!

I taught you how to read, and you learned to frame people!

In this cultivation world, where might makes right, Gu Yue and her hot-tempered dad and troublemaking brother turn a comeback story into a family melodrama disaster.

As for becoming a mighty expert?

Hah, let’s talk about that tomorrow...