I Summoned a Skeleton, and It Wants to Take Me Along on Its Jianghu Adventures

[Overwhelming Army of Summons]+ [Summons Show Off and Crack Jokes]+ [Outnumbering the Enemy]+ [Hot-Blooded, Shock-and-Awe Style]+ [Crowd Reactions and Contrasts]

What I look like to other people: A genius who’s been top of the class for three years straight, a physical monster and an unrivaled powerhouse, the only SSS-rank class wielder, and humanity’s future savior.

What I’m really like: A poor guy driven mad by his own summons.

When other mages chant their spells, the heavens tremble.

Me: “Come forth, my legion!”

The skeletons: “Coming, coming~ Boss, where are we partying today?” (They’re holding beer and kebabs.)

When other summoners are in sync with their beasts and fight in perfect harmony…

Me: “Attack! Tear that enemy to pieces!”

My Skeleton King: “Hold on, let me wax these bones first. Looking good is important.” (He pulls out a polishing cloth.)

When I want to look impressive in public and really show off…

I say coldly, “Behold the terror of the undead!” and summon a battle-hardened skeleton.

Instead, the skeleton pulls out a megaphone and starts shouting, “Jiang Hao owes 350 million and ran off with his sister-in-law!”

Jiang Hao: “I didn’t! You’re making things up!”

When I want to team up with the S-rank Ah Xiu…

I say tenderly, “Ah Xiu, I’m here to protect you!” and summon the Bone Monarch.

Instead, His Majesty kneels before Ah Xiu and pulls a rose of the undead from between his ribs. “Beautiful lady, may I have the pleasure of sharing a candlelit dinner with you tonight?”

Ah Xiu: “…Qin Xiaohei, why don’t you two just get together?”

How do I get my summons to behave themselves? Please help, it’s urgent!