I Barely Survived the Third Shinobi World War, and Now You Want Me to Solo the Ninja World?

Let me give you the conclusion first: I only want to be a slacker in Konoha, but the entire village leadership thinks I’m playing some grand game.

[Hiruzen Sarutobi’s Perspective]

Yuan Cangjie applied to attend the Ninja Academy? (Pondering) He doesn’t want to get caught up in my struggle with Danzo, so he’s lying low and waiting for the right moment! This boy’s maturity far exceeds that of his peers. He has great potential!

[Danzo’s Perspective]

Yuan Cangjie refused to join Root? (Sneering) He saw through my intentions and brushed me off with that “shaky hands” excuse! A killing weapon that refuses to be controlled must either be subdued or destroyed!

[Orochimaru’s Perspective]

Yuan Cangjie said he was tired? (Feverishly) What an interesting lie! The immense life force within him even makes me tremble! He must be plotting some kind of “truth” beyond the Hokage and immortality! I must have him!

[Fugaku Uchiha’s Perspective]

Yuan Cangjie refused to ally with me? (Horrified) He instantly turned my genjutsu back on me! He isn’t dodging, he’s warning everyone! He’s warning every faction in Konoha not to bother him, or else...

[My Perspective]

(Holding a saury, looking utterly bewildered) Should I braise it or pan-fry it tonight?

(Scratching my head) Come to think of it, why are they looking at me so strangely today?

Please, stop imagining things! I really don’t want to be Hokage. I just want to start collecting my pension early!