Zinedine Zidane retired, and France couldn’t get over it for six years.
Ferenc Puskas retired, and Hungary couldn’t get over it for sixty years.
Gao Qiu retired, and China couldn’t get over it for a thousand years.
But today, I, Gao Qiu, have returned.
Allow me to introduce myself.
My name is Gao Qiu.
I am the Grand Marshal of the Imperial Guard of the Great Song, and the Grand Commandant personally appointed by His Majesty Emperor Huizong.
I am also the greatest cuju player in the Great Song.
An accident brought me to a world a thousand years in the future.
The people here have changed the name of cuju to football.
They even say it’s the world’s number one sport.
I laughed.
In front of me, the way you play is nothing more than children playing house.
I dribble past the entire back line as if no one were there.
My free kicks go exactly where I aim, every single time.
Headers, bicycle kicks, long-range shots: I’ve mastered every skill in the book.
The coach who doubted me was kicked out on the spot.
The superstar who mocked me was rubbed into the ground.
Every country that looked down on the Chinese national team was cut down by us.
I have only one goal.
To lift the World Cup.
To let the whole world know:
The Great Song’s cuju is the best in the world!
