(Spell fanfic + dual heroines + stickers + redemption + "no knife")
Su Muxi, a girl from China, experienced a tragic childhood when both her parents died. She was burdened with a terrible curse, which made her have a withdrawn character. When she grew up, in order to explore her own secrets and gain enough strength to avenge her parents, she came to the Tokyo Conjuring College to study. Here she met like-minded and reliable companions, as well as a girl who attracted her heart...
This is the first work of a new author. The writing may be average, and there are many settings that I understand. If you have any questions, you can ask them, and the author will try his best to correct them. If you don't like this type, please don't scold me. Please #apologiseeverything.
Reader comments
Hello, we are all new authors. I would like to give you some suggestions that I have summarized to help you write better.
1 There is no strong conflict in the first chapter, so it is not easy to retain readers.
2. There is too much text per paragraph. It is recommended not to exceed 50 words.
3 The character of the protagonist is unclear, and it is currently difficult for readers to get involved.
4. It is necessary to highlight the role of the protagonist and write more about the inner activities. Otherwise, the reader's sense of involvement will be very low.
5. Don't have too many supporting characters at one time. It's best to have only two or three people, otherwise it will look chaotic.
6. You can ask AI to take a look at your writing and provide suggestions on its strengths and weaknesses.
7 One thing that is well written is that the plot serves the main storyline and includes food and accommodation.
8 The characters of the supporting characters are a bit inconsistent, but it's not a big problem
9 The rhythm is not well controlled, the key points must be highlighted
10 There are few exciting points and the plot is relatively bland. Of course, this is your style. You can change it or not.
11 It is not recommended to have too many original roles, and it is also recommended to reduce the number of original roles.
12. The conflicts written are not strong. There are some anecdotes. You can find tutorials on the Internet to leave hooks and strong conflicts.
13 The emotional line is well written, but the pace is a bit fast (like me), but as a book that mainly focuses on emotional drama, there is a problem
14 The pace is really weird and fast, and the part where the heroine loses her memory may be a poisonous point.
15 The supporting characters always steal the show when they shouldn't appear, and the heroine and Glass don't interact enough
16 You can take a look at the book written by the overseas student Song Zaiwu. It is basically the same type as what you wrote.
In short, the writing is okay, there are no flaws, but it is not outstanding enough and it is difficult to stand out.
The heroine of the book I wrote is also a girl. Anyway, we are close friends. You are welcome to read my book and discuss the plot with me.
I've seen Chapter 17 so far
The overall impression of Chapters 1 to 17 is pretty good. In the Huaiyu chapter, Tenuchi Riko has a bit of a character problem. In the original chapter, she called herself a concubine because she was being sent to be assimilated with Tianyuan, so her character is very middle-class.
I'm wrong. I have a very average personality.
The writing sometimes suddenly deteriorates, but other times it's pretty good.
A very nice book, well written.
Glass is so cute [send heart]
The plot is quite smooth and can be understood by those who have not read the original work.
Damn it, give me more >o<
Very good article ꒦ິ^꒦ິ, it really suits my taste, I will keep reading it⌯>ᴗo⌯ಣ
The interaction between Mu Xi and Jiazi is very cute, I look forward to the subsequent plot.
I feel vaguely that something is not good. Does Xia You really want rat?
It's so beautiful, it drives me crazy even if I don't read books.
Hello, we are all new authors. I would like to give you some suggestions that I have summarized to help you write better. 1 There is no strong conflict in the first chapter, so it is not easy to retain readers. 2. There is too much text per paragraph. It is recommended not to exceed 50 words. 3 The character of the protagonist is unclear, and it is currently difficult for readers to get involved. 4. It is necessary to highlight the role of the protagonist and write more about the inner activities. Otherwise, the reader's sense of involvement will be very low. 5. Don't have too many supporting characters at one time. It's best to have only two or three people, otherwise it will look chaotic. 6. You can ask AI to take a look at your writing and provide suggestions on its strengths and weaknesses. 7 One thing that is well written is that the plot serves the main storyline and includes food and accommodation. 8 The characters of the supporting characters are a bit inconsistent, but it's not a big problem 9 The rhythm is not well controlled, the key points must be highlighted 10 There are few exciting points and the plot is relatively bland. Of course, this is your style. You can change it or not. 11 It is not recommended to have too many original roles, and it is also recommended to reduce the number of original roles. 12. The conflicts written are not strong. There are some anecdotes. You can find tutorials on the Internet to leave hooks and strong conflicts. 13 The emotional line is well written, but the pace is a bit fast (like me), but as a book that mainly focuses on emotional drama, there is a problem 14 The pace is really weird and fast, and the part where the heroine loses her memory may be a poisonous point. 15 The supporting characters always steal the show when they shouldn't appear, and the heroine and Glass don't interact enough 16 You can take a look at the book written by the overseas student Song Zaiwu. It is basically the same type as what you wrote. In short, the writing is okay, there are no flaws, but it is not outstanding enough and it is difficult to stand out. The heroine of the book I wrote is also a girl. Anyway, we are close friends. You are welcome to read my book and discuss the plot with me.
I've seen Chapter 17 so far The overall impression of Chapters 1 to 17 is pretty good. In the Huaiyu chapter, Tenuchi Riko has a bit of a character problem. In the original chapter, she called herself a concubine because she was being sent to be assimilated with Tianyuan, so her character is very middle-class. I'm wrong. I have a very average personality.
The writing sometimes suddenly deteriorates, but other times it's pretty good.
A very nice book, well written. Glass is so cute [send heart]
The plot is quite smooth and can be understood by those who have not read the original work.
Damn it, give me more >o<
Very good article ꒦ິ^꒦ິ, it really suits my taste, I will keep reading it⌯>ᴗo⌯ಣ
The interaction between Mu Xi and Jiazi is very cute, I look forward to the subsequent plot. I feel vaguely that something is not good. Does Xia You really want rat?
It's so beautiful, it drives me crazy even if I don't read books.