Before Lu Chen went down the mountain, the old abbot gave him three rules:
First, no monk's robes. Second, no shaved head. Third, he had to enter the secular world dressed in a suit and tie.
Lu Chen was baffled. "I'm just a guy who taps a wooden fish. Why do I need a suit?" The old abbot smiled kindly. "Go be the father of capitalists. Go be the ancestor of the wealthy."
And so, a bizarre Zen master appeared in the city.
Other ritual masters wore Taoist robes. He performed rituals in bespoke suits. Others cried, "Boundless Celestial Venerable!" when facing tribulations. He shouted, "Boss, scan the code!"
A wealthy mogul begged him to change his fortune. He complained that the incense money was too paltry, then turned around and cut off the man's source of wealth.
A top-tier star encountered something supernatural late at night. As he chanted a sutra for the dead, he complained that her makeup was so thick it was blocking the evil energy.
Then one day, the whole internet went wild.
There was the legendary Zen master in a suit, one hand rolling prayer beads and the other around the icy CEO, calmly joining his palms before the camera:
"Your evil energy is too strong, benefactor. You'll have to top up your account."
