Qi Luosheng loved Zheng Duhao for eighteen years.
When she was twelve, she got lost in the Zheng family’s backyard. He led her back to the front hall, then stopped and glanced over his shoulder at her. That one look was enough: she never found her way out again. They met again in college, and beneath the osmanthus tree, she handed him a love letter. In one corner of the envelope, she had drawn a tiny sprig of osmanthus. He took it and slipped it into his pocket without reading it. She was happy all day.
For five years of marriage, he treated every kindness she showed him as a scheme. Every Saturday, she made shrimp and crab congee and steamed egg custard for herself. When she learned he liked sweet-and-sour pork, she added it to the menu out of love for him. But she could count on one hand the number of times he came home for dinner. He slept in the guest room and never looked her in the eye. Every WeChat message she sent became a read message with no reply.
She thought time would prove everything. Then one day, when she told him she was pregnant, he grabbed her by the throat and shoved her onto the sofa. A few days later, she fell down the stairs right in front of him and lost the baby. He stood at the top of the stairs the entire time without taking a single step down.
Once her heart had died, she calmly made her will and signed the divorce papers. After signing, he threw the pen onto the table. “We’re even? Not unless you’re dead.”
Later, he really did receive news of her death. Before walking into the sea, she had written one final line in her farewell letter: If everything can be forgiven, then the pain I suffered was all my own fault.
After that, he began searching for her like a madman. He refused to believe she was dead, convinced she was just hiding. He went through every trace she had left behind, only to discover that the truth about their marriage was the exact opposite of what he had believed. But the world no longer had the woman who made him sweet-and-sour pork every Saturday.
Self-righteous remorse is worth nothing.
The story line is clear and the pacing is great. In fact, there is no regret medicine in this world. If it is gone, it is gone. If it is missed, it is missed.