Let me start with the conclusion: I traveled through time and became the most damn man in the entire Water Margin.
Wu Dalang. Three inches of Ding Gu tree bark. Seller of cooking cakes.
My wife is Pan Jinlian. Mrs. Wang lives next door. Ximen Qing swayed across the street.
Standard script: get greened, poisoned, buried.
Good news: I have a golden finger and the Nine Yang Mind Technique. The more I practice, the stronger I will become, taller and more handsome.
Bad news: The horoscope of a man is "face to face love" - the stronger he is, the more women he will attract.
Scene one:
I was selling cooking cakes on the street, and Zhao Sheng (a Tokyo nobleman disguised as a man) passed by.
She glanced at me twice.
The guard stopped me: "Young master, I'll treat you to tea."
Wu Song (raised eyebrows): "Brother, even if you sell a cake, someone will treat you?"
Scene two:
I went to the drug store to discuss business, and Wu Yuemei poured me tea.
I said "body is more important than business".
Her ears turned red and she ran away holding the list.
Bai Sheng (whispering): "Brother, don't you know what you look like?"
Scene three:
When I returned home from Qingfeng Mountain, Pan Jinlian wiped the blood for me.
The handkerchief wiped on my palm over and over again.
"Dalang, are we finally safe?"
I held her hand in my backhand.
She didn't hide.
Wu Song coughed loudly in the courtyard.
Everyone: Why is Wu Dalang? !
Ximen Qing (blood pressure soars): Wasn't he three inches tall before? !
Cai Jing (frowns): How come a cake seller in Yanggu County is more difficult to deal with than the imperial court?
Result: The cooking cakes are no longer sold, the bandit village is destroyed, the restaurant is opened, and the map of Liangshan is obtained.
I will rewrite the script of Water Margin.
