A Vampire Sacrifice’s Survival Diary

The Story of How I Was Sacrificed by My Ex, Became the Shared Offering of Five Psychotic, Obsessive Vampire Hotties, and Used My Office-Drone Mindset to Set Their Workplace in Order and Take Down the Vampires

Become a sacrifice? Oh.

Wherever you’re an office drone, you’re still working. I’ve just got a more hellish boss now.

My name is Lin Yue, and I’ve become the shared offering of five vampire lords.

They circled the coffin and sized me up like a brand-new coffee machine.

The research lord said, “Fascinating. Worth studying.”

I thought: Another daily report to write?

The enforcement lord said, “She must be brought under management.”

I thought: Do they have KPIs too?

The unhinged lord licked his fangs.

I thought: That counts as workplace violence. I can report him, right?

The lovesick lord started crying.

I thought: ...An emotionally unstable coworker. What a pain.

The bewitching lord winked at me.

I thought: Is his eye twitching?

So, while the lords expected me to be afraid, cry, or fight back, I quietly pulled out the employee handbook I’d brought from my old world and flipped to the chapter on “Cross-Department Collaboration.”

“Um,” I said softly, “if you’re going to drink my blood, could we make a schedule? I want to take a compensatory day off next week.”

After that, things gradually started to get weird.

They stopped discussing how to “use” me and started arguing instead:

“Who did she smile at for 0.5 seconds longer today?”

“Who’s allowed to bring her warm blood plasma?”

“Who made her sigh this time?”

I sighed at the towering stack of “Lord Performance Grievance Forms.”

Bosses these days are so hard to manage.

But whatever. When it’s time to clock out, the sky won’t fall.

The art of being an office drone is keeping at your job even in a vampire’s den.