When Lu Yan flung the check in my face, I was calculating how much he owed me in overtime pay.
He said, “The stand-in game is over. Get lost.”
I handed him a Labor Contract Termination Agreement, complete with an itemized list of emotional damages.
He tore it up.
I smiled. “That’s fine. I recorded it. President Lu, your company accounts will be frozen in half an hour.”
Later, he got on his knees and begged me to take him back.
I started a timer. “Relationship counseling, 5,000 an hour. Pay first, then talk.”
He tried to hug me.
I said, “Physical contact comes with a 200% emotional surcharge. Receipts available.”
I quit being a stand-in and became the boss instead.
Now he’s the one working for me.
