Raising Interstellar Cubs Using Earth's Parenting Manual Has Become a Hit

On a meteor shower night, I made a wish to pick up a baby, but I actually picked up a glowing baby from the balcony. He calls me Mom, and his staple food is chewing stars on the iPad. He can also turn the neighbor's aunt's curly hair into colorful disco balls. I thought I was just raising an alien cub. It wasn't until the "Abnormal Phenomena Research Society" came to my door that I knew—— What I picked up was not a baby, but a walking "conceptual" causal weapon. Now, he is eager to try my Party A PPT... Help, can this kid be returned?