[System + Transmigrate into a Book + Lighthearted Comedy]
I, Chu Wansui, have always dreamed of doing nothing but lying flat.
But the System insists on making me fight for favor in the palace and join the rat race. Fine, then! Just watch me come up with all kinds of ways to court death and slack off!
My first attempt at courting death: serve leftover soup to the germophobic emperor.
Me, prepared to die: “Your Majesty, this is the soup of the realm that I made just for you!”
The result: He puts me under house arrest, but has the imperial kitchen recreate the leftovers in the middle of the night so he can figure out what I put in them.
My second attempt at courting death: do radio calisthenics at the sacrificial ceremony.
Me, seeking death with all my heart: “This is an ancient secret dance. It's only natural that ordinary people don't understand it.”
The result: He insists the dance embodies the Dao of Heaven and names me the [First Promoter of Fitness in Great Xia].
Later, the System tells me to attend the emperor's bedchamber.
I look at the sleeping emperor and say, “You jerk, you almost look human when you're asleep.”
The result: He rolls over and pins me down. “Make another sound and I'll deal with you right here.”
System, get out here! I thought you said he was asleep!
[System notification: Heartbeat +10. Congratulations, Host, you've unlocked a hidden storyline!]
Help! There's something wrong with this System!
Seeing the increasingly dangerous look in his eyes, I finally get it.
In this emperor's eyes, courting death equals flirting, and slacking off equals acting coy.
There's definitely something wrong with this emperor!
