The Heavenly Court's Maintenance Man

My name is Li Xiu. I used to be a registered programmer in the Heavenly Court. Now I'm a freelance repairman for the Three Realms.

Ever since I opened this shop, my client list has gotten more and more outrageous.

Nezha: The Wind-Fire Wheels are sputtering. Inspection fee: three fire dates.

King Yama: The Book of Life and Death keeps lagging. Rush fee: ten boxes of incense.

Dragon King: The Sea-Calming Needle (high-quality knockoff) is too noisy. Repair fee: a box of century-old pearls.

Yuelao: The matchmaking algorithm crashed and paired a bunch of ill-fated couples. This month's KPI is in danger. Please send emergency help!

I thought that was the limit of what a wage slave could handle.

Fixing magical treasures, tweaking systems: Sure, the clients were a bit difficult, but a quote could solve anything.

Until...

The Tribulation System marked my work order "Top Secret."

The cooling unit for the waters of the Forgotten River overheated, and Meng Po's soup began to boil.

Black, viscous sludge erupted from the sea eyes in all Four Seas. Wherever it went, even spiritual energy rotted away.

I opened the error log and found that every alert pointed to the same source:

[Unknown process "Guixu" is consuming the core resources of the Heavenly Dao]

[System crash countdown: ???]

Now, the missed calls from everyone in the Three Realms are bursting out of my magical communication talisman.

The latest message came from the Jade Emperor's office, sounding urgent:

"Engineer Li, the Heavenly Dao seems to have a virus. Can you work overtime?"

"We can discuss the payment... How about using the Hall of Miraculous Heavens to settle the bill?"

I checked my account balance, then looked at the screen full of 404 errors.

Slowly, I typed into the quote:

"Full virus scan and System reinstall."

"No credit for this service."

[Technical cultivation x everyday wage-slave life x hardcore after-sales support in the primordial world]

[When mythology turns into a BUG, the only one who can save the day is a laid-off repairman]