My name is Bald Qiang, a lumberjack and a third-rate inventor.
It wasn't until I exploded a spiritual vein that my neighbors started acting weird.
Cultivation diary, first day:
Xiong Er secretly ate the wrench I soaked in the spiritual spring. Now it burps and emit sparks, and insists that it has understood the "Way of Swallowing Hardware".
Cultivation diary, day seven:
Xiong Da announced that his tree cave was "the most blessed place in Gou Xiong Ridge, Cave Heaven". It cost three jars of honey to enter the cave, and it was mainly used to help sleep and enlightenment. Attachment: The force with which it kicked its legs in its sleep could kill a foundation-building wild boar.
Cultivation Diary, Day 30:
King Jiji asked me to build him a "crown of stars", otherwise he would activate the monkey hair clone technique and have 10,000 monkeys recite his throne edict at my door. Help.
Cultivation Diary, Day 100:
An army of monks from outside invaded the territory, claiming to destroy our group of "mountain spirits and wild monsters".
I looked around me - on the left was Xiong Da who was sleepy but invincible with his feet on the ground, on the right was Xiong Er who was trying to lick the opponent's flying sword as candy, and above him was King Jiji sitting on a homemade auspicious cloud (actually a ball of marshmallows).
I sighed and activated the mecha's loudspeaker:
"That... Demolition team, right? Talk to my neighbors and remember to bring enough honey and protection money."
"Also, don't wake up Big Bear, he's angry."
