At 2:47 in the morning, I finished editing the 48th version of PPT, hit my face on the keyboard and typed "asdfghjkl", and died suddenly.
When I opened my eyes again, the emperor asked me: "A fish bone stuck in my throat, is this a warning from God?"
Me: "Your Majesty, this is biology."
The emperor laughed and rewarded me with a jade pendant. That night, Zhao Shilang, who was forced into the palace, had his throat slit, and the murderer left a "doing justice for heaven". I:? ? ?
Liu Ruyan, the daughter of the minister of Dali Temple, stopped my sedan chair and said, "Servant Zhao cannot write the four words "Pede for the Heaven". And - on average, you have seven more words per sentence than a normal person."
Me: Are there still data maniacs in ancient times?
I received a threatening letter when I got home: "Shut up, or you will be next." I counted, and there were three words less than a normal threatening letter - quite polite.
What's even more outrageous is that I found someone using their fingernails to pinch the triangle mark. Until I found a page in the pile of old books: "It was drizzling outside the window when Chen Yan died." Looking up at the window, the weather was turning cloudy.
It turns out that I am cannon fodder in a historical novel. But since we can break the situation, it is better to break it completely - break the situation of the court, break the situation of fate, and break the situation of narrative.
Emperor: "If you serve one more term, I will give you a salary increase."
Me: "Okay, I'll give it another five years."
——After all, one sudden death is enough.
[Modern speaking skills crush ancient officialdom·Meta-novel cannon fodder counterattack·Laughing and crying]
