Transmigrated into the body of an abandoned consort, she’s about to be sacrificed by her scumbag husband from the start?
Shen Qingluan calmly pulls out a scalpel. “Don’t rush. Let’s give the side consort a C-section first and let whatever’s making trouble in her belly get some fresh air.”
With a deafening bang, she sets off into exile with three “seeds of world-ending evil.”
This family is delightfully unhinged, living by one rule: “If I have no morals, you can’t blackmail me with them.”
• Eldest treasure, the tyrant: While everyone else rides horses, he rides the wolf king, outfitted with a genuine leather saddle. Pointing at the bandits by the road, he says, “I’ve taken a liking to you. Go clean my toilet.”
• Second treasure, the poison master: Annoyed by the guards’ noise, he gives one of them a candy that turns him into a “human firework display,” crackling and flashing all night long.
• Third treasure, the fortune-teller: He smiles sweetly at an assassin. “Uncle, you’ve got a dark aura between your brows.” The next second, the assassin slips and stabs himself right through.
The one who has it worst is their real father, Xiao Jinghan.
The reborn regent had planned to do the noble thing and kill the three little terrors himself.
But what happens instead?
He struggles along at the front, carrying a blade and acting as a human shield, while the children snack on melon seeds behind him and shout, “Dad, make your moves look cooler! Don’t hold up our ascension to the throne!”
[The core premise]
This is a story that turns “Chinese-style horror” into a “comedy variety show.” On this road to exile, even ghosts have to offer them a cigarette, and any deity who shows up has to leave half the toll money behind.
[Before you dive in]
Don’t mess with this family. They don’t kill people. They just want to turn you into one of those dancing specimens.
