My unrequited love, possessed by an ancient Cthulhuan god, suddenly called me while I was working as a bathhouse scrubber, scrubbing the back of a wealthy woman. “A drought is coming. I grant you the Black Tide ability. You can command the world's second-largest ocean current at will.”
At first, everyone thought it was just an ordinary water outage.
Then the earth split open, rivers dried up, bones covered the wilderness, and the supernaturals emerged... The masses had no choice but to abandon their fantasies and face reality: a drought sweeping the globe had arrived!
Only I stayed cool as a cucumber. After all, my unrequited love had been possessed by an ancient god and turned into a great prophet, and had warned me to prepare early.
At last, my dream was about to come true in the drought-ravaged apocalypse: the bathhouse was open for business!
Sing my praises, everyone! The continents may have turned to deserts, but showerheads, bath towels, soaking pools, spas... I alone have them all!
As if that weren't enough, the world's second-largest ocean current, the Black Tide, came calling, ready to obey my every command. Gifted with supernatural powers, I could become a god with a single thought. The Black Tide ability was mine!
People from every faction and profession joined forces to form an army of returning customers, arriving in a mighty, never-ending stream at this kingdom of bathing. And so the virtuous gathered, young and old alike: deadbeat debtors, Sanhe workers, populists, self-proclaimed public intellectuals, animal-rights activists, social Darwinists; domineering CEOs, elite soldiers, tycoons, prodigies; top models, married women, mature beauties, sweet young things... Immortals and mortals alike lined up here in droves.
Why should every group, race, and organization remain locked in hatred? Once they step into the “Peaceful Bath,” everyone becomes a harmonious, united community. They can go back to fighting once they've dried off! Hey, keep the blood out of my pool!
While running the bathhouse, I'll make time to investigate the origins of the drought and these supernatural powers!
Northeast China bathhouses, dance once more!
Looks good! Looks good!