If the Engagement Fails, the Twin Princesses Are Packed into My House

I feel that the overall story is okay, the plot is well connected, the characters are very three-dimensional, and the writing is pretty good in Tomato. However, I personally feel that there are a few small problems [Thinking] The protagonist has a sense of justice because he traveled through time, but it is a bit disgusting to risk his own risk and ask his family members who have always been in high positions to show sympathy to unknown low-level people or even prostitutes. And it's a bit too compact. I have to deal with the thin horse before the food issue is finished. If there are really people who are holding back and holding grudges against high-ranking officials and powerful people, it's not the end of the world [face covering], but overall it's still okay. I hope the author can continue writing without interruption and pay more attention to the rhythm of the writing.

The author details his five deadly sins: 1. Book title crime: The originally planned "From the Skinny Horse Stable to the Princess's Mansion" is actually more consistent with the full plot. Most of the plot of the Jiangnan chapter revolves around a group of skinny horses. The protagonist's acquaintance with the princess has already reached the later stage of the story, so the current book title is not very fitting. 2. The crime of greed: After writing the plot of Jiuchongjin, too many female characters were added one after another. I always wanted to write all kinds of characters into the story, but in the end no one was able to portray the image well. Sure enough, the more greedy you are, the less sure you are of everything. 3. Mentality crime: Failure to stabilize the mentality when creating characters, often bringing in one's own emotions to create creative biases, leading to character deviations. Just like the original Lian'er, she was made to be too sharp and contradictory to her mistress and elders (now corrected). 4. Crime of redundancy: trying to take into account all the plot lines, multiple emotional lines, Jiangnan New Deal, investigating smuggling, investigating poisonous poisons, breaking off engagements... The plots are piled up, without distinguishing the priorities, and the rhythm of the story is not well controlled. 5. Conception crime: On the one hand, some plot transitions are stiff and abrupt, and the reading is slightly abrupt; on the other hand, the character creation tends to be homogeneous. It is also easy to add irrelevant characters at will during creation, creating unnecessary conflicts and disputes, and disrupting the flow of the story in vain. Finally, some sharing of writing experience: The author loves his characters, at least I do. But after Jiuchongjin, I suddenly had a time when I couldn't write. For example, Xiao Qing, I wanted to treat her as a very bad villain, but the buff I added to her was too strong, and I didn't even know how to let the protagonist deal with it. Every time I want to deal with her, I just feel like there is a lump in my throat, like a light on my back, and I can't even breathe smoothly [crying] Then there is Xiao Ruier. I wanted to write her as a cute girl who is innocent and evil, but she became a scheming girl inexplicably. She has a sinister belly and a black heart. I am really confused and can't tell the difference [crying] Finally, there is Xiao Rendong, the princess of the former dynasty who I have the highest hopes for. She fell in love with the male protagonist and eventually put aside her hatred and merged into the big family in the finale. But it seems that she has been shaped by me into a bad woman who keeps threatening the male protagonist. The heroine who is supposed to be holding a revenge script is trapped in the male protagonist's inner house [crying] The author is a newcomer, and in just two and a half months, he has gone through all the pitfalls of platform rules and writing. But being new is not the reason why you can't write a good story. For this reason, the author would like to say sorry to the readers who follow the update! I'm sorry that I couldn't give you a good reading experience. I'm sorry that I took you to the title page of the story but failed to appreciate the beautiful scenery along the way... After finishing the Jiangnan chapter, the author will continue to improve his writing skills, polish the plot, and present readers with interesting works. This comment is an introspection, an apology, and a reminder to new readers. Respect!

Very nice to look at. The writing style is smooth and there are many themes in the book. Moreover, the characters in the author's works have very upright views and do not act mindlessly. As for the character, I currently like Zhao Nanyi the most. She is the foster daughter adopted by the Duke of Jingguo and has a secret crush on the male protagonist. The male protagonist said, "How can a person not feel the warmth when standing next to the fire?" The younger sister is mad, the male protagonist is restrained, and it is only a matter of time before the two of them fall. Then there is Lu Molian who appeared first. She is more controversial, but I think there is nothing wrong with the logic of her behavior. When there is a dead end at both ends, you can only test it out. Playing the cup (without actually playing) is a helpless move. From hypocrisy to sincerity, it depends on who sinks first! And other female characters are also appearing one after another, each with their own grace and charm. As a harem novel, it is considered a slow-paced one. The male protagonist and the female character have emotional foreshadowing, and it is not just about lighting up the illustrated book and it's done. Also, the novel is very logical. The protagonist's family has been developing silently for five years, and the modern things he studies are quite reasonable. Then there are the shortcomings: 1. The map is still in Jiangnan, and Princess Changan was only mentioned in Chapter 100. 2. Later, multiple female characters appeared at the same time, and it was a bit unclear to distinguish the heroine and the supporting actress. Summary: This type of article itself is new wine in old bottles. The novelty of the wine depends on the level of writing, the progress of the technology tree, and the behavioral ethics of the characters. This article is currently eligible. Shennong will continue to read, and there will be no feedback, so you can feel free to enter. [Like] Does the author play a certain four-word game? The characters with the deepest emotional lines have all been touched. According to this rule, won't Xiao Ruier be able to escape? [Sinister smile]

The writing is good, but it's too much, too fast, so I have to finish slowly, slowly, and rhythmically [Thinking]

The author's writing is very good.

The food was served quickly and with few chopstick moves. I commented that it was just a show of food. .

A belated review. Although the author has already cut the book, I still want to affirm the author's writing style. His words and sentences are quite good. It shows that he has a certain literary quality. I personally feel that it is a pity that the design of the characters and plot is lacking and not attractive enough. As a result, not many people have read this book. Take the male protagonist and Lu Lian'er, who occupies a large space in the beginning, for example. Lu Lian'er was too strong in the early stage, and the male protagonist fell too quickly. At least it didn't feel comfortable to me. It's not that you can't write about girls with such strong characters, but So, but for the male protagonist, we can't write too passively. It feels like he is being led by Lu Lian'er all the time, and even his heart beats too fast. It's not as good as you and me. Finally, let's chase the husband in the crematorium and be together again. This can at least satisfy the audience's "pleasure" psychology, and then some of the plots in the future. The plot issue has also been mentioned in the book review area, so I won't go into details. In short, if the author can design the plot to be more suitable for the audience, I believe that the author's writing skills will improve at some point. Please continue to work hard. I still want to see the author's subsequent works.

The book is a good book, but The Case of the Slender Horse in Jiangnan is too long, and there are too many female supporting characters who appear continuously in the middle, which is too unnecessary. Even if it is cut, it is reasonable, expected, and understandable. Come on, the author will work hard [I learned it] [I learned it] and I wish you will be enlightened soon.

The characters are three-dimensional, not the same. The protagonist also shows the expected IQ in investigating cases, but he is not brainless. It is just that the plot is not very good in the love between men and women, and he does not know how to refuse. A soft-hearted sentence in this matter seems too mediocre. From the senses, the protagonist is led everywhere, and the relationship between men and women is not clean. It would be better to have such a rejection plot appropriately or a plot dominated by the protagonist himself.

It looks good, the writing is good, no big problems I had to give my support. I found out that the author updated 9 chapters in one day and I felt so good.

Good-looking, good-looking, good-looking, good-looking

The book is good. The writing style and prose flow smoothly. Overall it looks more comfortable. It's just that they take in too many girls too quickly. What's a little bit unbearable is that. Why does the male protagonist have to give in when a woman cries or makes trouble? It feels like as long as she is a woman, she can manipulate the male protagonist at will [face-covering] [face-covering]

There is foreshadowing, the protagonist picks up Xiaoyi😊 Su Suisui came to power, which I didn't expect

Super beautiful, love to watch

Okay, great potential

I want to see the uncut version [cry][cry][cry][cry]

Okay, the plot is good

Good book, you should give me fire Hey, good books just aren't popular. They're so good.

It's okay, just say some modern words directly in front of the ancients, there are too many beauties, how will it end later, and how will the honeysuckle end.

Let's give the book some popularity. It's well written, but there aren't many people commenting on it. It's deserted.

This book is buried gold. The plot is clear and the characters are vividly drawn. Why isn't it popular?

I haven't seen such a beautiful book in a long time.

It looks pretty good, but my sister is a bit poisonous [note]

It's pretty good, it's intriguing, the logic is clear, and the layered narrative method is not confusing. It's quite interesting.

The pace is good and the characters are all unique. I am looking forward to the plot behind it. Good luck, author.

The author's writing style is really good. I found the best one this time. I hope the author can stick to it and finish it.