My whole life has been ruined by Mandela. I can't get along with decent girls. When I'm eating with a girl, I keep thinking, If only she were Mandela, small and sweet-smelling. When I'm walking her home, I keep thinking, If only she were Mandela, how nice it would be to go home chatting and laughing with her. When I'm sitting on her sofa and she says she'll make me a cup of coffee, my whole life has been ruined by Mandela.
