Honkai: Star Rail: Terminally Ill, I Kiss Kafka from the Start

Jiang Jiahao transmigrates into Honkai: Star Rail and starts in hell mode: he has a terminal illness called “Stellaron Corruption,” his whole body is rotting, and he has only three days to live.

He binds to the [Bad Review, Die Trying System]. If people hate him, leave him a bad review, or kill him outright, he can return to Earth in a healthy body and become a billionaire.

To survive (by returning to Earth), Jiang Jiahao drags his sick body through a series of utterly bizarre, deranged stunts to get himself killed.

Facing Kafka, he pins her against the wall and forces a kiss, his bloodied lips meeting hers. “You old hag, your lipstick tastes disgusting. I’m going to puke.”

Facing Ruan Mei, he knocks over her petri dishes. “These trash experiments are better off destroyed. Then they can accompany me to the grave.”

He thinks he’ll be met with bullets and poison.

But instead

Kafka gently strokes his pale cheek, her gaze smoldering. “Are you pretending to be a bully to push me away so I won’t be sad? You silly boy…”

Ruan Mei gazes at the mess on the floor, her cheeks flushed. “He’s teaching me about the fragility of life and the beauty of destruction… He’s the only one who understands me.”

Jiang Jiahao coughs up blood and breaks down. “I’m really not some devoted romantic! I just want to die! Please stop reading so much into this!”