[Harem, harem, harem; wish-fulfillment, wish-fulfillment, wish-fulfillment] You know the drill.
I am Marshal Tianpeng, commander of the Heavenly River’s hundred thousand troops! Old Jade Emperor, what gives you the right to banish me to the mortal realm? What gives you the right to seal away my immortal roots? What gives you the right to declare that in five hundred years I’ll fall into the animal realm?!
You never dreamed that the dual-cultivation arts the Heavenly Court regarded as garbage would become an overwhelming, next-level advantage in the mortal world!
Five hundred years later, when the calamity of the Journey to the West began and Guanyin Bodhisattva came looking for me, she was stunned on the spot!
She gazed at the demon-immortal army covering the mountains and plains, drawn up in armor and with unfathomable cultivation, and actually wondered if she had come to the wrong place.
I stood with my hands behind my back and sneered. “Bodhisattva, that whole business of fetching the scriptures is work fit for pigs. I’m busy right now, purging the marrow and cleansing the bones of all living beings in this mortal world, and remaking their path to immortality!”
If the Heavenly Court has no place for me, then I’ll tear down its rotten heavens! I’ll build a bright and just world with my own hands, and make all three realms bow before me!
From that day on, the Journey to the West was cut short, and the name Tianpeng became a nightmare that all gods and Buddhas would never escape, for all eternity!
