The Scumbag General Begs for Mercy on His Knees

Xie Sifan was speechless. He’d transmigrated into a male favorite and become a White Lotus’s human shield. He’d dodged the obvious attacks, but not the underhanded ones.

Scene One

General: Can’t you say something a little nicer?

Xie Sifan: Ever heard of a boy from Zu’an? Zu’an’s the stage, so bring your mom if you’ve got one.

Scene Two

Guard: Reporting to Madam, the general was ambushed and captured by the enemy.

Xie Sifan pretended to wipe away a tear, barely managing not to laugh out loud. “How tragic. Put up the mourning banners.”

Guard: ...Aren’t we going to rescue him?

Xie Sifan: We could, but there’s no need.

Scene Three

The great general looked at his beloved little wife, who acted as if loving her would get him nowhere, and was furious. But he couldn’t hit her, and he couldn’t win an argument with her. What could he do? All he could do was spoil her.