Warhammer: I'm Really Not Fixing Bugs in 40K

After transmigrating into Warhammer 40K, programmer Li Ang discovers that this grimdark universe is really a cobbled-together operating System riddled with spaghetti code, logic bugs, and memory leaks. Warp corruption? A system error caused by incompatible low-level drivers. Tyranids? An unchecked memory leak. The Orks' Waaagh! energy? Distributed cloud computing powered by collective consciousness! The Adeptus Mechanicus? A bunch of script kiddies who can only kneel and pray over the manual! Looking at the Emperor, frozen on the Golden Throne for ten thousand years like a crashed server, Li Ang pushes up his glasses and opens the developer console: “Looks like a system overhaul is the only option.” “First, let's run a virus scan on the Emperor.” “Next, let's add the Orks to the mining rig cluster.” “Finally, let's send Slaanesh a 404 error.” The moment Li Ang hefts his keyboard and types sudo rm -rf /* (delete everything) at the Khorne daemon army, the entire galaxy falls silent. This is the story of a programmer bringing open source to the Warhammer World, fixing bugs, and uploading the Emperor to the cloud along the way.