"Fabian 'The Long-Lived' Maximus."
He was a veteran of the Imperial Guard. His name was proper and honorable, but his behavior was thoroughly "anti-Imperial humanity."
It wasn't his fault. Ever since who knew when, all sorts of strange thoughts had been popping into his head.
"The Fourth Millennium"
"Tin Cans and Their Can Openers"
"What's wrong with a sexy big sister? She just wants you to be happy."
"Getting old makes you constipated."
He had no idea what any of it meant, but it had left him acting like a lunatic. He might be that old veteran in the Imperial Guard who was always complaining and always trying to finish missions at the lowest cost, only to cause enormous losses. In an empire that glorified sacrifice, he was a living heretic. The title "The Long-Lived" was a joke about how he just wouldn't die.
By the Empire's standards, he was practically anti-human. While others charged forward shouting, "For the Emperor!" he might be looking for cover and grumbling, "The Emperor won't fix my prosthetic, you know."
"By the Emperor's utterly useless holy name, the battle plan you lot came up with is so bad even the Orks would have to praise it as 'proper WAAAGH!'"
Now this "least pious but most entertaining warrior of the Emperor" was ready to spread his dark humor across the galaxy.
Good-looking🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭