In Journey to the West, Reporting People Makes Me Stronger

Modern-day wisecracking girl Lin Xiaoxiao accidentally transmigrates into the world of Journey to the West as a veteran NPC doomed to be beaten to death by Sun Wukong three times: the White Bone Demon.

Faced with a hellish start, she promptly binds herself to the “Three Realms Reporting System” and vows to change her cannon-fodder fate by filing reports.

And so, the whole Journey to the West goes completely off the rails.

She reports Sun Wukong for flying his somersault cloud without a license and confiscates his Golden Cudgel as collateral. She reports the Heavenly Court cafeteria for withholding celestial wages and swipes peaches as a thank-you gift. Even when the Golden-Winged Great Peng illegally expands Lion Camel City, she files a lawsuit and gets it torn down.

With a report in one hand and a recording stone in the other, Lin Xiaoxiao goes wherever she pleases throughout the Three Realms, raking in merit rewards. But why does the head of the Celestial Realm’s disciplinary committee, Erlang Shen Yang Jian, keep looking at her so strangely? He’s the one who keeps arriving to enforce the law after she reports him, always wearing a cold expression.

Later, when she reports Lingshan for unfair year-end bonuses and the Buddha crushes her beneath his palm, Yang Jian cleaves open the Five-Finger Mountain and shields her beneath the boundless radiance of Buddha’s light.

“Don’t be afraid. I’ll take you home.”

Only then does Lin Xiaoxiao realize: she made her fortune through reporting, while he used her reports to climb the ranks and get a raise, all while pursuing a wife.