Twelve**********

It's okay. Except for the writing style, I personally don't like the slow or conventional writing style of online articles. It always has a sense of being mysterious. Although the online articles are laughed at as being in vernacular, if it weren't in vernacular, many people probably wouldn't even be interested in reading it. Overall, the setting is novel, the subject matter is stable, the main plot has a general direction, and the supporting characters are also well-characterized (albeit a bit traditional). The author's top priority is to make more updates. Judging from the style, I guess it may be a new work by a newcomer. Just update it steadily and keep writing.