Mortal************

Overall, it's okay, but the minor poisons are more obvious. For example, the protagonist forcibly creates conflicts after becoming a core disciple of the Giant Sword Sect. In a place like the world of immortality, who would be the leader? Just because the protagonist became a core disciple, he started spreading rumors and ridiculing him? Even if you go through the back door, you don't dare to provoke me. After all, if you can go through the back door, it means you have a relationship. It's not something you people who can't get through the relationship can provoke. Flattery is pretty much the same.

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The title is quite attractive, a proper dimensionality reduction attack, using the east wind to fight mosquitoes🦟 A person with one level of Eighty-nine Mysterious Skills can become an immortal.

Come on, author. I have read the first few chapters. The concept is very good. The logic can be cleaned up. You can learn from fellow Taoist Wangyu and write more details about fighting and character creation to make other characters more vivid. Finally, highlight the extraordinaryness of pig's feet.

The writing is quite good, just follow your own ideas. Some people say that there is no need to pay attention to those who overwhelm the competition, and there is no need to be realistic in fan fiction. Some original books are self-defeating, and it is difficult to agree with others. Writing a book requires a lot of brain power, and caring about these will make your own ideas confusing. Or you can write some tags in the introduction to filter out readers.

Dimensionality reduction blow! The transformation is so easy to use, and so far the original plot and the protagonist's personal plot are a bit better.

As long as you can stick to finishing the Human World chapter, don't be like taking a train later. It's pretty good so far, but when I think about what I wrote earlier, I feel like I haven't written anything at all. I'm not impressed at all. Maybe it's because I read too many things.

I also saw the latest chapter, and overall it's okay.

Why do you have to get a scientific training device? Just fuck me.

Very good. Please update soon. Don't be like those crappy novels you did before [laughing]

It's the type I like to watch. Come on, author

Just like human beings

Good job, author [like]

The writing idea is wonderful, I hope you can write 200,000 words.

Comrade author, what you write is really interesting. You must be very rigorous and super conscientious to avoid all the points that may be sealed, and write the book to the end for me🤜🏻

It's a big hook, but the plot is okay. It can be read as an invincible novel.

It is a rare fan who directly writes the biography of a mortal cultivating immortality. The writing is also very good, and it is worth recommending!

Not bad, don't stop, it's really hard for Tomato to be optimistic about Mortal fandom, and I don't know why Tomato trolls like Black Mortal so much Rating is too low

It's beautiful, the only one in the world, don't change the plot, don't have a female protagonist! Come on! ! !

Very well written and worth reading

Very good and worth a look

The fanfic is pretty good

Good idea, you can read this version

Beautiful and well written

Okay👌🏻Keep up the hard work, come on

Got gold out of shit

The writing was pretty good, but it's a pity it's gone [cover face][cover face][cover face]

How can a mere mortal be blocked when writing about it? Aren't there many people who wrote about Tomato?

Come on, author, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on.

You can also hang some cattle. Others are good.