I'm a new author, it's my first time writing a book, so please give me some light feedback.
[LOL system + multiple female protagonists + Western fantasy]
Liang Ye traveled to a fantasy world.
The gods here are real. Fortunately, he has loaded the LOL system. Upgrading can improve attributes, and killing can obtain powerful equipment and hero skills.
In this world where elves, dragons, evil gods and monsters exist, in order not to become a pawn of the gods, Ryono embarks on a numerical path of no return.
Facing the monster, Ryano held Punishment in his hand and murmured: "I remember, I... I have always been the king of LOL!"
Reader comments
The Japanese Asashi male protagonist, the contrast between before and after is too great. I feel like having a team slows down my pace. As expected, I still like the one where I can level up alone.
Adventure in another world starts with jungle
Rice is good
It's a fun way to fight when you're adventuring alone. There aren't many routines, and the writing is quite detailed. The protagonist's acting style is also relatively straightforward.
After that, the girls in the adventure group had the typical images of two-dimensional light novels.
Gentle, cute, playful, aloof, etc., Riqing's style is very strong, and it doesn't look like a real adventure.
But for me, I can accept this kind of character design, but the description is too embellished, which is really inconsistent.
About three and a half stars, the story is somewhat novel after all.
New book issues are rounded up.
You can do it before clearing the Goblin Cave. The reconnaissance eyes are useless. Others and their teammates have already come to the protagonist's face before calling the police. After the high-intensity fighting, the protagonist is not alert when he sees people, but is in a state of confusion. I didn't expect this. There is really no such thing here. I'm going to stop complaining for a moment, and the all-female teammates are unacceptable to me, but I think there must be some people who can accept it, so I give it four stars. It can't dampen the author's enthusiasm. Let's leave it at that. See you again in the future. I hope your next book will be better👋!
The writing is quite good, and the slow pace makes it easy to read. By the way, have you ever considered loading a hero template for the protagonist, such as the Star-casting Dragon King? After all, I am dragon-loving and it would be quite appropriate for me to turn into a dragon.
Although the transition between single-player adventure and team in the early stage is rather abrupt, and the character templates are relatively classic, it is at least a qualified Japanese adventure novel. As for the number of heroines, I can only say that there are a thousand Hamlets for a thousand readers.
Not bad, the author's writing style is very good, whether he is writing battle scenes or life scenes. It's just that the change in the portrayal of the male protagonist acting alone and after joining the team is abrupt, and the style change is a bit hasty. It would be better if the pace was slower and the changes in the male protagonist's feelings for his teammates were slowly depicted during team battles.
Beautiful and worth recommending! ! ! !
The protagonist and his harem [making faces]
Although it refers to the setting of the game, the storyline is carefully written. It is a good novel and worth reading.
The Japanese Asashi male protagonist, the contrast between before and after is too great. I feel like having a team slows down my pace. As expected, I still like the one where I can level up alone.
Adventure in another world starts with jungle Rice is good It's a fun way to fight when you're adventuring alone. There aren't many routines, and the writing is quite detailed. The protagonist's acting style is also relatively straightforward. After that, the girls in the adventure group had the typical images of two-dimensional light novels. Gentle, cute, playful, aloof, etc., Riqing's style is very strong, and it doesn't look like a real adventure. But for me, I can accept this kind of character design, but the description is too embellished, which is really inconsistent. About three and a half stars, the story is somewhat novel after all. New book issues are rounded up.
You can do it before clearing the Goblin Cave. The reconnaissance eyes are useless. Others and their teammates have already come to the protagonist's face before calling the police. After the high-intensity fighting, the protagonist is not alert when he sees people, but is in a state of confusion. I didn't expect this. There is really no such thing here. I'm going to stop complaining for a moment, and the all-female teammates are unacceptable to me, but I think there must be some people who can accept it, so I give it four stars. It can't dampen the author's enthusiasm. Let's leave it at that. See you again in the future. I hope your next book will be better👋!
The writing is quite good, and the slow pace makes it easy to read. By the way, have you ever considered loading a hero template for the protagonist, such as the Star-casting Dragon King? After all, I am dragon-loving and it would be quite appropriate for me to turn into a dragon.
Although the transition between single-player adventure and team in the early stage is rather abrupt, and the character templates are relatively classic, it is at least a qualified Japanese adventure novel. As for the number of heroines, I can only say that there are a thousand Hamlets for a thousand readers.
Not bad, the author's writing style is very good, whether he is writing battle scenes or life scenes. It's just that the change in the portrayal of the male protagonist acting alone and after joining the team is abrupt, and the style change is a bit hasty. It would be better if the pace was slower and the changes in the male protagonist's feelings for his teammates were slowly depicted during team battles.
Beautiful and worth recommending! ! ! !
The protagonist and his harem [making faces]
Although it refers to the setting of the game, the storyline is carefully written. It is a good novel and worth reading.
Looks good. I hope I can get more girls.