Sacrificial Dao

[Anti-Lovecraft. Apocalypse in the early stages, infinite worlds in the middle, cultivation in the later stages. A feel-good story with setbacks, saintly do-gooders, wishful thinking, repaying kindness with kindness, and helpless rage.]

[Prove the Dao through poison. Come and test it at your own risk!]

After surviving three tribulations, a weasel spirit only needs to ask someone to grant it a title to become an immortal!

The first time, it found a monk and stood before him, asking clearly and properly,

“Do I look like a human or an immortal?”

The monk said nothing. He skinned it and made himself a fur coat.

The second time, it found a nun and hid behind her, asking clearly and properly,

“Do I look like a human or an immortal?”

The nun said nothing. She took its flesh to treat her gonorrhea.

The weasel spirit was reduced to a skeleton. Unable to speak or walk, it was utterly despondent.

Just then, Ye Ji walked past, carrying two bald heads.

“Hey, this skeleton has arms and legs, and slender fingers. It looks…”

“Just like a wage slave paying off a mortgage, working from dawn till dusk and scrimping to marry a woman, only to discover the kid has dark skin.”