After I Returned My Son to My Best Friend, They Went Mad with Regret

As I lay sprawled on the carpet, taking a break, I suddenly heard a babyish voice:

[I've done so much just to keep Mom looking beautiful! I have to be held by such a slovenly woman every day. Has anyone considered how I feel?]

I jolted upright and looked at my son, lying beside me and sucking on his hand.

Just as I thought I was so tired I'd started hallucinating, the voice came again:

[What are you staring at? You're so annoying! If I weren't impressed by how carefully you take care of me, I'd have found a way to get Dad to kick you out long ago!]