Cultivation Depends Entirely on Pirated Techniques

I’m Goudan, the notorious bastard of Qingniu Village. Then a thunderbolt split open my family’s ancestral grave and blasted out a grumbling old white-bearded con artist who claimed to be an immortal! Other immortals give out powerful techniques and treasures, but this old geezer tossed me a copy of the “Pirated Handbook for Subduing Demons.” Scattering beans to summon soldiers just makes soybeans sprout, and cutting paper into horses gives you a lame donkey that kicks up its heels! When I charged at monsters astride a smoke-belching, three-legged paper donkey and wielding a worm-eaten peachwood sword, the whole cultivation world laughed itself silly. “Is this country bumpkin putting on a monkey show?” Little did they know that this pirated heavenly text concealed a shocking secret even the Jade Emperor wouldn’t dare reveal... [Highlights] · [Hilarious Cultivation] + [A Subversive Take on Piracy] + [A Down-to-Earth Hero] · [A Bizarre Start] A bolt of lightning blasts out a dad?! · [Disastrous Skills] Scattering beans makes them sprout; paper horses turn into kicking donkeys! · [Shocking Secret] This pirated heavenly text hides a world-shaking secret that spans countless realms!