Reborn as Dong Zhuo? The System tells him from the start that he has only three years left to live?
Master Dong stared at his fleshy face in the bronze mirror, then at the System panel’s “Suicide Mission Checklist,” and nearly dropped dead on the spot:
The Eighteen Princes are coming to his door? The mission requires him to pin their leader, Yuan Shao, to the ground and make him sing “I Will Conquer You.”
Lü Bu glares at him? The mission requires him to steal Lü Bu’s Red Hare and even boast that his own kitchen knife is better than Lü Bu’s Sky Piercer Halberd.
Most absurd of all, he has to bring beauties like the Qiao sisters and Zhen Mi into his household, supposedly to “protect flowers in these troubled times”?
“So I’m supposed to offend every big shot in the Three Kingdoms?” Master Dong clenched his fists, but when he caught sight of the fearsome Xiliang cavalry outside his tent, he suddenly grinned.
What’s there to be afraid of?
Everyone else sees Dong Zhuo as a traitor who brought ruin to the country, but he intends to exploit a System bug to gain heaven-defying abilities: he equips the Xiliang army with improved crossbows that can shoot farther than Lü Bu’s arrows, and even under the name “Dong the Bandit,” he quietly cultivates wasteland outside Luoyang, stockpiling enough grain to feed half the realm.
Lü Bu calls him shameless? “Little Lü, lend me Red Hare for three days. Next time, I’ll teach you how to use your Sky Piercer Halberd to plow a field.”
Cao Cao wants to assassinate him? “Mengde, your poems are pretty good. How about coming to work for me as a clerk?”
Three years of life? That’s enough time for him to turn the Three Kingdoms into a complete mess!
Master Dong weighed the butcher’s knife in his hand. The System notification read, “Zhen Mi recruitment progress: 1%.” He grinned. “Don’t rush me. Let me plunder Cao Cao’s provisions first, then we can take our time talking about life.”
