The Three Realms Are in Ruins, and Three Rebellious Troublemakers Cry, 'We're Back in Business!'

There are no more worshippers in the West, so Yahweh had a brainwave and joined forces with the eight great religions to wage a divine war against the Three Realms of the East.

The three notorious troublemakers in the Heavenly Court were itching for a fight.

Monkey: I think the Garden of Eden would make a fine place to grow Peaches of Immortality. I’ll just take it.

Lotus Root Powder Monster: The Aegean Sea is mine. Poseidon, go ask Ao Guang for a job.

Three Eyes and a Dog: You guys have picked your spots, right? I’m not picky. The bigger the territory, the better. My 1,200 Grass-Headed Gods still don’t have official posts. The local land gods and City Gods can all be sorted out too.

Jade Emperor: Watch yourselves. Don’t take too much. Leave a little for the immortals to drink.

Buddha Tathagata: Monkey, hit them hard. Spare Brahma, but kill Shiva and Vishnu if you can.