The System Forces Me to Become a Great Hero

[Want to lie flat? The System says, “Nice try!”]

Is the martial world all bloodshed and chaos? Not for Gu Tang, a lazy disciple of Sunset Gate. To him, the martial world means spring noodles with extra meat in the cafeteria, a grassy slope in the back hills where he can sunbathe, and a monthly allowance of three taels with absolutely no overtime. His life motto: if he can lie down, he will never stand!

Until one day

“Ding! Host detected with terminal laziness. You meet the requirements for binding with the ‘Justice KPI System’!”

Forced into action, Gu Tang wept:

Help the cafeteria auntie find her missing fat cat? Failure penalty: perform an embarrassing broadcast-style exercise routine in public!

Teach an influencer how to use a sword? Payment: a health-preserving sword manual, complete with a square-dancing soundtrack!

Judge a martial arts tournament? His opponent roars, “He’s eating sunflower seeds while giving his critique!”

When an audit notice from the Martial Alliance arrives and pirated sword manuals run rampant through the martial world… Gu Tang sprawls in his rocking chair and cries out from the depths of his soul:

“I just want to be a quiet, lazy fish. Why is this System forcing me into the rat race?!”