I transmigrated into the cultivation world, where the sect had been massacred from the start, leaving rivers of blood.
After a few “experts” rescued me, I, Jiang Jiao, an utterly ordinary modern college student, thought I’d landed myself a powerful backer.
But this Yunlan Sect... how should I put it? Their mental state is a little too advanced.
Wild boars can bring down the protective formation. A leaky roof in the main hall can double as a skylight. Their archenemy even drew a drooling bun on the stone stele at the mountain gate!
Every senior brother has his own bizarre style: Second Senior Brother is a one-stop shop for staged accidents and swindling; Third Senior Brother is ruthless and taciturn, but a clean freak; Fourth Senior Brother talks too much, has a kind heart, and is on the verge of a breakdown every day. Even Master is a mischievous old child who goes around picking fights and helping himself to other people’s magical treasures.
I’m a mortal with a “Heavenly Spiritual Root” and no ability to cultivate, so every day I question my life choices.
They stew thousand-year-old spirit ginseng for me to nourish my body, use ancient cultivation manuals to prop up table legs, and insist I’m the sect’s hope for a glorious revival.
But right now, my only wish is not to be poisoned to death by Second Senior Brother’s demonic cooking again.
Help, can a sect full of these legendary idiots really teach me to cultivate?
On the third day, I was washed around under a waterfall like clothes in a washing machine, all to make my body “unlock” spiritual energy.
My senior brothers go broke every day trying to keep me fed:
Second Senior Brother goes down the mountain to “stage an accident” with a Black Mountain Boar.
Third Senior Brother sneaks out at night to steal chickens with his blade skills.
Fourth Senior Brother packages failed pills as “healthy snacks.”
Master says that once I stop getting swept away by the waterfall, I’ll officially be able to cultivate.
Me: ??? Do you cultivate through enlightenment, while I cultivate through hunger?
Behind these lighthearted, ridiculous daily antics, could there be a truth about the sect’s destruction?
Whatever. Eat first, save the world later.
